Give me an idea of approximately how fancy I'm expected to be and I will make the utmost effort to meet or surpass that level of fanciness.
08.06.05    radiolarien.jpg
ravishingly resplendent radiolaria
Ernst Haeckel: Die Radiolarien, 1862
Scanned in for your enjoyment, beautiful radiolaria illustrations. pillow pal
This holster will prove useful, attached snugly to your mattress; whether its for your handgun, your stun gun, or your aerosol chemical agent.

Better yet: get 3 pillow pals--one for each. Werner Von Wallenrod's big page of novelty rap records
It's funny how interesting it is to read about these records which you would probably never ever want to listen to.

Wayne and Charlie (The Rapping Dummy), who released an album on Sugarhill Records in 1981, also won the Most Fascinating Novelty Rap Artist Award, which is an award that I made up just right now.

I don't spend a lot of time reading the 'help wanted' section, but I do know that there are very few opportunities out there for ventriloquist rappers, no matter how talented they are. So kudos to Wayne (and Charlie) for making a go of it.

And I love the idea of ventriloquists throwing down rhymes where they boast about their ventriloquism skills.

I hope that at least one time it happened in our world that there was a ventriloquist dummy rap battle. I don't hope that that rap battle ended in a dummy versus dummy knife fight, but I do find it to be an engaging mental image.

By the way, I should warn you that when you visit that web page, it plays the sped-up loop of Roger Miller's "Whistle Stop" (made famous by The Hamster Dance). I guess it's an appropriate enough background to a page about novelty rap. Because it's irritating. TV Party: Holmes & Yo-Yo
Short-lived comedic crime fighting robotic buddy cop TV show from 1976.

Watching this show helped prepare young Americans for the future in ways that learning the metric system did not.
another fun thing for big foot to be holding: kittens
Except he's not carrying them.

Bigfoot is lying on top of overstuffed fluffy pink comforter on a heart-shaped bed. The room he's in is outfitted in mostly pink and white, with unicorn posters and rainbows and glittery stars and things, like it's maybe an elementary school girl's room.

And bigfoot's on the bed, covered with a dozen frollicking kittens. The kittens are rolling all over and bumping into each other and bigfoot can't stop laughing.

[Thanks Tracy!]