use next teller please.
i'll be out for a few days, working my booth at the collectible doll show. in the meantime....
other daily link-list weblog things:
plus, you should probably read this month's smug.
the benicetobears daily is also good.
|plastic wrestler vending machine|
on 24th street, between York and Bryant in san francisco. dispenses tiny plastic wrestlers in transparent plastic bubbles--25˘. just beneath another one that vends little plastic guns.
vatican teen cyberzine|
pretty good parody. rad jesus. funky pope.
i thought it was just a crazy funny product name, but it serves a real need: it "Re-instates the smell of Traditional Quality Leather." This site is insane--all the stuff they want us to know--especially on the second page.
"Leather is skin, dead skin."
"ALL LIQUID LEATHER CONDITIONERS SMELL OF TOP QUALITY ENGLISH LEATHER WHICH WILL IMPREGNATE YOUR LEATHER WITH THIS LUXURIOUS AROMA."
Plus all the leather-treating pictures look borderline pornographic. i mean, maybe it's just me but they seem pretty raunchy. And the hand model has nasty, dirty nails.
elsewhere there's the realvideo of the Liquid Leather infomercial, which i hate realvideo for several reasons including some really bad crashes and the way their registration process makes you unclick a hundred different checkboxes that say
this infomercial is for liquid leather. i watched it with the sound off and enjoyed it just because i was so mesmerized by the product name, but i can't say if it's worth watching otherwise. certainly if you don't have a realplayer installed, don't install it for this.
|excitement, drama, burnt toast|
not just burnt, but on fire. i had the GE Deluxe Toast-R-Oven set on 5 (it goes up to 9) and was making toast. i forgot about it. next thing i know, the toast's not only charcoal black, but on fire, with 3-inch flames licking the top of the toaster oven. it's a good thing it wasn't a real emergency because i couldn't for the life of me figure out how to put out the fire. i wasn't panicked or anything, but i definitely couldn't think straight enough to solve the problem either. at least i realized that the fire extinguisher was overkill. i shut the oven door to cut off its oxygen, but that didn't work and probably ruined the toaster. a saner head thought to extract the toast with wooden toast-removing implements and drop it in a pan of water.
now i smell like burnt toast.
ALL BURNT TOAST CONDITIONERS SMELL OF TOP QUALITY BURNT TOAST WHICH WILL IMPREGNATE YOUR HAIR WITH THIS LUXURIOUS AROMA.
|why does it seem so wrong to put on a belt in public? here's my list of clothing items roughly in order of how wrong it is to don them in public, with 10 being least wrong, 1 being most:|
it all seems to make sense, except for belt. why is belt so wrong?
"1. other???" is in there in case there's some unmentionable clothing item that is so taboo that in my sheltered life i've never even heard of it.
you just can't beat that name."What should you expect from a reconditioned and factory-certified Putzmeister boom pump? World-class equipment!"
overheard on the bus: "some dolphins can be really mean. male dolphins will band together in packs and bully other dolphins."
|04.29.99||hidden Netscape features|
on a whim, i sent netscape to about:mozilla, and it gave me an easter egg that you'll only see if you're on netscape. if you're not, it looks like this. i tried a bunch of others but of course i never found any more. the guy at the above url did it the smart way (instead of my monkey-typing-shakespeare method); he reverse-engineered the browser.
Fight BAC!™ Store
with Mother's Day™ about a week away, here's where you can get Mom™ a mug that says "Keep Food Safe From Bacteria™" with the Fight BAC!™ germy guy logo on it. Fight BAC!™ also has a list of the 10 Least-Wanted Foodborne Pathogens™, (with pictures of the pathogens! thank you!) which is awesome, especially if you're like me--a big Clostridium Botulinum™ buff.
|i just figured out how to do this: ™|